A year ago today I was falling

in love

with your clumsy heart, strong hands, mandolin love songs 

your hand was gripping my thigh on the back of your motorcycle

with a thank god I’ve got you here kind of smirk

My lips were burning with a forever crush,

now they are burning with words I’m not allowed to tell you.

Today I am speaking to you only through the poems in my veins

I am still falling

with the leaves

I am laying on the ground beneath all the bright colors,

looking up at naked branches shivering in this October wind 

how cold they must be,

I wonder if they were ready for the seasons to change

I wasn’t