Questioning feelings

Questioning feelings

Hey. What's up. Hello. Here's the thing: I've been dating my wonderful boyfriend for two years and have never looked twice at another man (I mean, within reason...can't ignore Zayn Malik obviously). we are very much in love and things are going great. However, I've recently started to quickly "feel things" for someone even though I still am in love with my boyfriend. I don't want to act on these feelings but they are frustrating me because I feel like they're hindering my relationship with my boyfriend. This other man is great but we don't talk a lot he's and not going to be in the same country as me for a while so things wouldn't work even if I wanted to which I don't. I cannot help how I feel but I also want things to go back to normal with my boyfriend in terms of feeling completely into just one person.

Signed,

Help me please

GIIIIIIRL I feel ya on the Zayn part. Every relationship has to have that one celebrity exception, where if you for some reason ran into them walking down the street you have full permission from your significant other to straight up lock lips with them on the spot. Perfectly normal. My guy is James Dean, however he isn’t of the living any longer so this might just be a bad example. I’ll stop rambling. 

As far as your real life guy goes- My girl, I know this isn’t going to be what you want to hear but I’m going to speak to ya from my battle scarred, messy, softened heart. I have learned first hand that even when you think things are going the best they could ever possibly go, you are wrong. There is always more growing to be done, and at some stages of life that growing comes in hurricanes. It needs to. I really really believe you when you say that you’re in love with your boyfriend, and it makes me giddy knowing so. But if you are in any way shape or form developing some sort of feelings for another guy, your heart isn’t in a stable place. 

It’s so tricky to navigate the heart, and I get that, goodness I get that. It’s easy to think that your heart knows what it’s doing on its own and that you’re safe just following it, but that leads you down dangerous roads until you have taken time to understand the purity behind where it’s taking you.

I think you need to take a hop, skip and a jump back, take your heart on a nice vacation, just you two and get to know each other again. You’ll know the answer to your questions after that. 

 

Yours Truly, 

The Damsel