booyyss

So I have a thing with this guy who I have been friends with for some time now, and he's awesome! I can tell he likes me a lot probably more than I like him. The problem is I am not sure if I truly have feelings for this guy or if I just enjoy his company as a friend and quite frankly just like the attention.(as bad as that may sound) Should I keep this up in hopes that my feelings progress or call it off before it gets more serious? How can you ever tell if you really truly like a guy.

Signed,

Pheobe Buffay

Phebes,

I’ve never related to a problem more than I relate to this one, my girl. I don’t care what anyone says, I will argue until my dying day that feelings are more complicated than any mathematic equation or scientific formula. You can eventually solve those, right? There are some feelings that will remain in knots that can’t be untangled for the rest of eternity. That’s fact, go ahead and quote me on it. I’ll take the heat from the heretics. 

The easy and probably ethical answer would be, call it off. If you’re on the fence about it now, you’ll probably be on the fence about it in 3 months, while in that time he’ll have just fallen even harder for you and you’ll have a much deeper hole to dig yourself out of. I personally hate nothing more than burning bridges, which makes cutting things off with people the worst imaginable thing. I hate the idea of losing a friend just because of some stupid feelings. But for the sake of preserving someones heart, you just have to sometimes.

The truth of the matter is, as much as it sucks to hurt someone just because your feelings don’t line up, it hurts them even worse to drag them along on a string, getting their hopes up.

BUT...then the completely un-logical, excessive hopeless romantic in me says give it a little bit more time. The best relationships really do come out of friendships. I’ve learned from experience. There’s nothing like dating your best friend. But by all means, NEVER force it. I digress...

All of that to say, I can’t give you your final answer, Phebes, that’s all up to your own intuition. But I can tell you this, take a close and honest look at your own heart, it’s near impossible to go wrong that way. And do not stop taking his heart into consideration. Best of luck my dear.

Yours truly, 

The Damsel